I have come close to marrying someone three times in my life. And for each of those three special people either death or incompatibility or backstabbing have been the result. I have spent the better part of two years trying to find someone to share my life with but to no avail. I have now reached the point where I simply must lay down the flag and cease carrying it any further. I am spent. The emotional turmoil I have dealt with in relationships has been more than I care to deal with anymore. I get attached to someone and things just don’t work out. I am not getting any younger and the time has come for me to say goodbye to trying to find someone.

So, today I made a big decision. I have vowed to remain a bachelor until the day I die. I can go forth happily knowing that I share this bachelorhood with some of history’s most remarkable, one of which just happens to be my favorite composer: Ludwig van Beethoven. It will be a lonely existence, but there are things to keep me company. My music has never cheated on me, tried to change me or died (well not yet at least). Through all of life’s troubles my music has always been there to comfort, console and calm me. I have two wonderful dogs who love me unconditionally. And I have the characters of my stories, through which I can live a life I never had. A life filled with love and someone to share it with. So while I may never know the love of another in my life, I have many loves that I can escape into which won’t result in a broken heart.

As Alfred Lord Tennyson said,  “‘Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.”

And so closes this chapter of my life.


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